So lately, I just want to fix all the things. Every last thing in my life. Everything I look at. Everything I touch. I need to fix it all, and fast.
My family just came back from the most amazing trip to Disneyworld. It wasn’t planned. It was completely spur of the moment. One day we are living our normal dragging our feet backwards lives, two weeks later we are in Florida. We were planning on staying in my husband’s cousins home while my mother in law was caring for her children. Her husband spends most of the year traveling for work while she stays home with their kids. She is suffering from an alcohol addiction and my mother in law was the closest person to her that she trusted to stay with them while she went away to try and rehabilitate her life. Her husband graciously flew us down there to see her because he has half a billion frequent flyer miles and he is just a really nice guy. So, there we were two weeks later finding ourselves at this strange home in Florida with these two kids we had never met before. Our hopes were high, and they were quickly crushed. The ashes were blown all over the tall grass that surrounded their property. This poor home had seen better days and these children were a mess. We spent two nights and three days with them and by then we were done. We packed up our kids late at night, rented a car and headed towards Disney. Our hopes, again high. We book a hotel room that looks great in the pictures only to show up to what looked like the Floridian version of a Motel 6 fully equipped with a Walgreens in the parking lot and we said no, absolutely not. We came all the way down here for a vacation. We packed up our kids and drove away from our family. We are going to have a vacation dammit, we will not settle for anything less. Twenty minutes later we were checking into a Disney hotel. Everything after that is a blur. Pure magic. Smiling happy pointing laughing and screaming with joy the four of us pranced around Disney like we were on top of the world. Sure it was hot, ok I will give you that. The day we spent at Animal Kingdom was an entirely new experience when it comes to walking around soaking wet in your own sweat for an entire day, continuing into the night with a trip to Disney Springs finished off by an incredibly loud and fun dinner at Planet Hollywood. It was the kind of vacation that changes your life. It changed my life. I came home from this vacation and realized A. I want my home to feel like Disneyworld. Clean, organized with a zest for life. Beautiful. I want my house to be beautiful and B. I want my children to know how much they are loved every single second of every single day. My kids mean the world to me. There is absolutely nothing on earth that is more important to me than them. Every feeling, every laugh and every cry I feel responsible for because I am the one who gives them the world. This is their world that I am giving them. No one else is in control of how they feel or their environment but me. If their house isn’t clean, if they don’t have a place to play or clean clothes to wear or food on the table there is no one else to blame but me (and of course my husband too). They are innocent children. This is the world that we give them. We choose.